Tallcan TV

Come get it in the can this Friday @ the GSR with BuckBean & Tallcan TV.

Just be sure you don’t have so much that you think this is a good idea:

-Wolfy

The next episode of Tallcan TV will be filmed on location at Can Fest in Reno.

Be there. It’ll be kinda like this but with 100% less Sterz.

-M

I’m not sure how this German dude got into my back yard, but he sure was funny!

Coors aka Yellowbelly Banquet Beer, 24oz Tallcan

Deliscious: yes

Alcohol content: 5.something %

Drinkability: 7

Sharpiedick Potential: 7

Do Germans like it: Not clear

-M

Well Sters was out on injured reserve and the Scripptard was out cat skiing, so Mike and Michelle joined me on stage for our first ever live episode of Tallcan TV.

It went really well. The audience was most receptive to our link between surfing and tallcan drinking as a way of life, or as Bodie from Point Break said, “it’s where you loose yourself and find yourself…”

They also liked our discussions of length and girth, for some reason.

Check out the slides from our presentation @ Slideshare.

Ignite Reno was RAD! Definitely check it out next month!

-M

Cold Cock!

Man I wish we could get a few cans of that! You one malt liquor piquor!

-M

We here at Tallcan.tv are pretty serious. As connoisseurs of what we consider fine brew, the staff/talent/celebrities/jackasses at Tallcan.tv decided we really wanted to have some beer that nobody else could possibly have. We’re kind of assholes that way. So the entire crew designated me as the official brewer of the bunch. I think this was because I have done it a lot in the past and nobody else can be trusted, even the guy who used to work as a chemist. Seriously. But that’s my opinion.

So, sometime around a month ago, I set out to make some beer. It had been a while since I went after it. I think one of the last times was when I had a horrific accident. I was naturally traumatized and had taken a little hiatus from the brewing life, but as duty calls, I knew I had to man up and get with it again. So I did.

After the boring part of the homebrew process (waiting for the beer to ferment), it came time to put the stuff in a vessel that would serve it to the thirsty masses. In this case, the vessel was a keg that’s been sitting in my garage and the masses are the morons who are a part of Tallcan.tv. Oh, and the time was yesterday.

So, yeah, there’s a batch of homebrew (5 gallons) in a keg sitting in my garage with a shot of CO2 making tiny bubbles form in it that will probably be gone in way too short of a time period. You may see it on a Tallcan.tv episode, but you may not. I know these guys. You don’t. Hope you see some, then call me. I’ve been known to send a bottle or two someone’s way if they compensate me properly.

-mrjerz

I remember back in the day drinking Natty Ice in College from something called a “bottle” that was either 22oz or 40oz. You don’t have to worry about what exactly that is. Just know that it was a phase and along with smoking cloves just to impress cheerleaders and wearing a jean vest over a leather jacket, I’m largely over it.

Above we see the TCTV crew, the team you don’t really know and certainly don’t trust, enjoying the amazing pairing of Natural Ice, chaw, and the invigorating waft of 2-stroke fumes. Not entirely sure which had the most effect on the level of discourse, but you can tell from our constant adherence to the BEER as the main topic of conversation that we did indeed love the stuff. For the most part.

Natural Ice is YET another Anheuser-Busch Beverage. But in this case, there is enough popularity around this product for them to have a microsite dedicated to it. From that site you can sign up for email and FREE CRAP! Ecplore and submit Natty-isms. Such Natty jargon includes: Natattat: The sound of three Nattys opening at once. Natidermist: One who loves his natty ice so much he has it stuffed and mounted. I might add Nattarded: The state of having drunk so much Natty ice that you blab on for an hour about it making it a royal pain in the ass to edit a sub 10 minute video about it.

According to Wikipedia: “The 5.9 % alcohol content and low price lends this beer to high consumption on college campuses.” We can all corroborate that fact.

For some reason Natty Ice got largely unfavorable reviews on BeerPal.com. Those people probably just need to train their palates and learn to pair this fine beverage properly with aromatic power tools and fine cut tobacco.

It also comes in special Natural Ice Lip Balm form.

Aparently the fine conna-sewers over @ Beer Advocate Forums didn’t like it either!

I think the take home message here, like fine wine, cheese and monday night football, is that if consumed alone, on it’s own merits, Natty Ice is unremarkable, lackluster and potentially yucky. BUT when combined with the catalytic effects of chainsaws, chew and the bro-mantic atmosphere of a bigass manGarage, Natty Ice can go head to head with anything in a can!

• Alcohol: 5.9% (v/v)
• Delicious: Yes
• drinkability: 6
• Sharpiedick Potential: 9
• Can: 24oz

-M

In this episode of Tallcan TV we hit the Sierra Arts Foundation’s Annual Brew HaHa @ John Ascuaga’s Nugget in Fabulous Sparks Nevada to sample the beers and rock out to Sol Jibe!

Lots of great barley pop to be had at this event! Thanks a TON to Sierra Arts for inviting us to cover the brews and have a few Ha Has! If you missed the event, when you’re done kicking yourself, which you should be since you probably weren’t hung over on Sunday, drop in over @ the Sierra Arts Foundation DONATE PAGE to support the arts in Nevada!

Here’s a list of beers we sampled:

• Oskar Blues, Dale’s Pale and Ten Fidy
• Rail City, Iron Spike
• Firestone, Pale Ale
• Michelob, Winter’s Burbon Cask Ale
• Buckbean, Orange Blossom
• Silver Peak, South Town Ale
• Great Basin, Icky and Bitchen Berry BEST OF SHOW!
• Unibroue, Maudite
• Ayinger, Celebrator
• Mammoth, Something, can’t remember and their website sucks…
• Blue Moon, Vagina Lager

What do you think about theese FINE beers? Let us know in the comments. OR hit the Viddler Video comment button and record you own taste test!

A couple of interesting side notes: Buckbean was the only reviewed beer to come in a non-12 oz can, and the staff @ the booth did indeed describe it, as is CLEARLY heard in the video, as a TALL CAN!!! Jerz:

-M

Sparks is a premium malt beverage brought to you by the Steel Brewing Company out of good old Molwaukee Wisconsin. It is made by combining 10 parts Steele Reserve, 4 parts redbull and 2 parts cherry slurpy. That recipie might actually work! If you’re too busy waxing your mangina to whip up that concoction before a hot-tub saussage fest, Sparks is for YOU!

Drinkability: 9

Delicious: yes

Sharpiedick Potential: 9

Buzz on the net:

This stuff will wake you up and mess you up all at the same time.  -Robert Gambell

In case you haven’t had Sparks, it is one that must be tried. It is technically a malt “beverage”, but doesn’t taste anything like most malts. I guess it is a malt like Smirnoff Ice, but it is certainly not a “girlie” drink like these. For one thing, it is an alcoholic energy drink. Who can beat that combo! Read more to find out about the Sparks goodness.  -Zach

A diet, or “Sparks Light” version, with a bright blue top, is also produced. A higher alcohol version (7.0%) called “Sparks Plus” is available in both 16oz and 10oz cans and has a black top. -energysip.com

If you haven’t tried Sparks, I HIGHLY recommend you avoid overtly gay hot tub situations…

This “American Malt Liquor” was made by Anheuser-Busch in their Galveston Texas bottling facility after Hurricane Rita, hence the name “hurricane.” It is a high gravity lager with more than the normal amount of alcohol because the Galveston bottling plant was without electricity for a few days. The Brewmaster at that facility came to work after the deadly natural disaster and found that the last batch of King Cobra had sat for a week festering. So he filtered it and whipped up a new can design on Windows Paint and gave the world HG High Gravity Lager…

Still, some people liked it.

That’s it folks, turn out the lights – the party’s over. A new champion has been crowned and it is brewed by none other than Anheuser-Busch in the great US of A. At $0.99 and 8.1% abv it is 24 oz of sheer terror for the competition. 

Made by: Anheuser-Busch

Hurricane Malt Liquor is brewed with a combination of malt and corn. Hurricane Ice is “ice-brewed” with a combination of malts and cereal grains to produce its distinct smoothness and body. Hurricane High Gravity is brewed with quality hops and extra barley malt to produce its full-bodied flavor.

Delicious: NOT  Though A-B has this to say about the “flavor” of Hurricane:

Hurricane Malt Liquor is full-bodied and robust and offers a smooth, slightly fruity and slightly sweet taste. Hurricane Ice offers extra smoothness and body, and Hurricane High Gravity offers a very full-bodied flavor with a smooth, sweet finish.

Can: 24 oz

Drinkibility: d-

SDP (sharpie dick potential): Extreme,

Don’t drink this beer around a black permanent marker of any kind.

Cost: $1.24

All in all worth the investment provided you have a suitable chaser like raccoon piss to cut the after taste. Though according to “badbeer” in BeerAdvocate Forums, you can get for $1.99 per 4 pack in Wisconsin… 

Alcohol content: 8.1 %

Though that can vary. Some states have laws which require certain stores to sell lower alcohol beers. According to “TheWolfOfMibu” In BA Forum, “the 8.1% ABV version is called Slurricane…”